The streets of Wokingham were a little busier this week. Scores of mums wandered around aimlessly with slightly dazed expressions on their faces. Finally FREEDOM, after 6 long weeks of summer holidays. Mixed in amongst the crowd there was a special group, made up of mums who had just dropped their child off to their first day of BIG school. The emotional rollercoaster was just about visible behind their tight and fragile smiles. Their bodies are here, wandering around the shops, especially shops with lots of breakable things in.... just because they can..; but their minds and their hearts had been left in the school corridor where they’ve just left their little one. Most of them search each other out and meet for a coffee....because now they can, and because they know that their friend will need the company and the chat.

There is a feeling of pride, mixed with guilt and a little hurt to see your child walk away from you into their new life as a school going child. Sure, it’s great that they are not clutching to your leg and crying like that poor unfortunate child across from you. But should there not be a little more of a backwards glance from them? More acknowledgement on their part of what a monumental step they are taking? Do they not know how lost you feel, leaving them there? There is a sense of losing your purpose, your reason for being almost. You’ve got not little person to look after for the next 6 hours. What are you meant to be doing? Sure there are piles and piles of housework that you could be getting on with... but returning to the too quiet house seems a little too depressing. That’s why the coffee shops and hairdressers of Wokingham are doing brisk business this week!

And while the children slip stream into the education system, and their mums look on from the sidelines... reluctantly, in some cases letting them go.. There will be some who are overcome with a sudden broody feeling. Something they could not imagine a few weeks ago when they would have given their wisdom teeth for 10 minutes peace to drink a cuppa. Being a mum suddenly to two school age children, marks the end of an era...but the beginning also of a time of great excitement, and changing roles. In time the feeling of loss will be replaced with gain... and a relief to have gotten so far, if a little too fast. Though I do realise that I will probably need counselling when they start college :)